Howard Falkinburg

Almost two years ago I had a supra pubic catheter installed when I had a mega kidney stone surgically removed. An SP catheter is a tube that carries urine from the bladder through a hole in my stomach below my navel and to a bag strapped to the bottom of my leg. Prior to this, I needed to be catherized every four hours, which was a pain in the ass. This was very inconvenient, especially when I was in the community, having to duck into a bathroom and drain the urine into a plastic urinal. I would also have frequent urinary tract infections, one of which almost killed me. 

The catheter needs to be changed every four weeks by the nurse. I also have to be careful not to have the tube accidentally pulled out of my stomach. The catheter site can get bloody and needs to be cleaned twice a day. We have to be careful of having kinks in the tubing, which blocks the urine from flowing into the drainage bag. This can cause autonomic dysreflexia.

I’m having issues lately with the catheter frequently getting clogged with sediment. The nurses flush the catheter twice a day to try and keep it clear. But the sentiment eventually clogs the catheter every few days and needs to be switched out. A urinalysis tested positive for a urinary tract infection so I’m starting on an antibiotic.

I pulled a good joke on Lucas, a part time residential staff couple nights ago. He helped a nurse change my catheter and was preparing to irrigate the catheter using saline solution. He had never done this before and was nervous he might inject bubbles through my catheter. The nurse assured him nothing would happen. Lucas started injecting the solution. I shook my body in a fake spasm by rolling my eyes back in the sockets. The nurse started shaking me asking if I was all right. A horrified look plastered Lucas’s face, thinking he caused a seizure by injecting bubbles into my catheter. After carrying on the joke another few seconds I burst out laughing. Fortunately, Lucas has a good sense of humor and the nurse smacked me on the leg for pulling the joke.