Howard Falkinburg

My life is over. I have no hope.

Those were my thoughts for several months after my injury. The old Howard was dead though my body was still alive. I could not walk, feed myself, or even scratch an itch in most places of my body.

I was a helpless lump of flesh.

I lost my identity and purpose. I was no longer working full-time as a therapist. I was in a rehabilitation hospital for several months and felt a disconnect from the world outside of human interaction outside of my room.

I got involved with the therapeutic recreation program at Mary Free Bed within a few weeks of my arrival. Initially, we would play adaptive games with the help of my occupational therapist, Riley McCartney and recreational therapist Ashley Phelps. I played cards and board games, only able to instruct by staff of what pieces to move or cards to play.

The following are therapeutic benefits of therapeutic recreation:

• Help restore client’s level of functioning and independence in life activities
• Experience connection and meaning
• Provide meaningful activity and leisure.
• Overcome barriers to well-being and/or participation in meaningful activities
• Utilizing recreation and leisure activities as therapeutic interventions to promote well-being

Ashley was my first Rec Therapist at MFB. We started doing activities on the floor by playing games. We then spread my wings by going on outings in the community.

This was a huge step for me. For one, I was nervous getting into a vehicle after after the accident. Also, I was embarrassed of being in a wheelchair and felt conscientious around other people.

At the time, I had a sip and puff and head array systems in maneuvering my wheelchair. I did not have enough movement in my left hand to steer with a joystick.

I required technical features to maneuver my wheelchair. I did not have enough functioning in either arm to steer with a joystick. The CareLink representative first installed a sipping puff system.

With this system, I blew into a tube to operate the wheelchair. a hard puff started the chair forward. Another hard puff increased the speed. A hard sip (or suck I would call it) stopped the wheelchair. Another hard sip puts it in reverse. A soft puff turned the chair right and a soft sip, left.

Are you following all this?

This system was a mitigating disaster. There was not a piece of furniture on that floor that I did not collide with at some point. I had extreme difficulty doing the soft suck. I would jolt to a complete stop instead of slowing down. It’s a wonder I didn’t get whiplash. I would also get lightheaded from all this puffing and sipping.

Once, I was having a conversation with a nurse sitting at the station. I accidentally blew into the straw. The chair vaulted forward and punctured a hole in the drywall with the foot plate. I also got stuck in the corner of the elevator. My hazard lights went blaring. I needed to be dislodged by security.

We decided to make a change before I killed myself or somebody else. I decided to go with a combination of the sip and puff, along with the head array system.

With the head array, there were two padded sensors at each side of the head. A subtle turn of the head left steered the wheelchair that way and vice versa. One drawback is when somebody off to your side says hello. I would inadvertently veer the steering wheel that direction.

Talk about multitasking!

It is hard enough steering down straight hallways. Getting in an accessible van is also a challenge. And I felt embarrassed being in a wheelchair.

I frustrated easily for several months. Many people lack spatial awareness and would walk into me or block my path. I am lower to the ground and can be easily overlooked. The view isn’t the best down there so it’s difficult to see openings sometimes among the jungle of people.

Covid hit a month after I moved to Hope network January 2020. There were no T-rec outing outings but we did activities in the building. Currently, we have our coffee and conversation guys group every Tuesday afternoon. I also go on individual outings every other every other week, which gives me a chance to explore places I might not visit or can’t because public transportation doesn’t go there. I also play Xbox golf with Evan weekly. It doesn’t replace the real game of golf but it is enjoyable. And I don’t swear as much.

I get out regularly outside of therapeutic recreation, primarily with public transportation. I volunteer (more on that in the future post) or meet friends and family out in community. I have ventured on my own to the movies and bookstores. It’s a crapshoot doing this because of my ileostomy and super pubic catheter bags. So far, no accidents have happened.

I have discussed with Evan the possibility of riding along in a golf cart just to watch and give unsolicited golf tips.

Therapeutic recreation has given me the opportunity to explore the community and new interests/hobbies of having a life in a wheelchair. It has given me confidence by facing down my fears and trepidations, along with a sense of purpose.